Indian Wedding Outfits for Couples: How to Coordinate Without Matching
If the two of you are going to an Indian wedding together, there is one question we get more than almost any other:
Are our outfits supposed to match?
No. And in most cases we would steer you away from it.
What you actually want is to look like you arrived together — which matters most in the photographs — without looking like you were issued a uniform. That is coordinating, and it is a different thing from matching.
Look at those two. They are not the same colour and they were never going to be. The maroon in his suit is the maroon already sitting in her hem and along her dupatta border. Nobody would call them a matching set, and yet they clearly belong at the same wedding, standing next to each other.
That is the whole idea, and everything below is just how to get there.
Start with whichever of you finds something first
Do not try to solve both looks at once. It is much easier to let one person fall for something, then build the second outfit around it.
Say she lands on an emerald lehenga with gold work. He does not need an emerald kurta — that is usually the least interesting answer available. A cream kurta pajama with a vest that picks up the emerald, or the gold, will look considerably better in a photograph.
It works the other way round just as well. If he already owns a navy suit or a kurta he intends to wear, we can find something that sits beside navy rather than hunting for the identical shade.
Connect one or two things, not everything
Couples tend to look best when there is a link between the two outfits that a stranger would not immediately be able to name.
It might be a single accent colour that turns up in both. It might be that you both have gold detailing rather than silver, or similar embroidery, or simply the same weight of fabric. Sometimes it is nothing more than the two of you being dressed to the same level.
One shared thread is plenty. Three or four and it starts to read as a costume.
The same colour can work — when the two pieces are doing different things
Navy with navy, and it holds up, because the two garments are not competing. Hers is a draped sari, his is a straight kurta over white, and the sequins read differently across the two fabrics. Same colour family, completely different silhouette.
Where an exact match goes flat is when both outfits are also the same shape and the same weight. Then you stop being two people and start being a set.
Do not go hunting for an exact shade
Indian clothing comes in an almost unreasonable number of greens, blues, pinks, maroons, ivories and golds. Insisting that both outfits land on precisely the same one throws away most of the floor before you have looked at any of it.
Coordinated, not identical. If one of the outfits carries several colours — and most embroidered pieces do — we can usually pull a secondary one across into the other look. That is the version that reads as deliberate.
Dress to the same level as each other
Colour gets all the attention, but formality is what people actually notice. Two outfits in different colours look fine together. One heavily worked formal outfit standing next to something distinctly casual does not.
Roughly how it goes across a weekend:
- The mehndi and daytime events — lighter, brighter, comfortable. Nobody is being formal at eleven in the morning.
- The sangeet — the dancing night, and the one where both of you can go as festive as you like. This is where the photographs happen.
- The ceremony — the most formal event, though what suits it depends on the kind of ceremony and the venue.
- The reception — usually where couples choose their dressiest pairing of the weekend.
If you are not certain how formal any of it is, bring the invitation in with you. We read wedding invitations with customers constantly, and the events, the venue and any dress code usually tell us everything we need.
Here the link is not colour at all. Mint and ivory are simply operating at the same softness and the same level of dress, which is enough to make them a pair.
You do not need to coordinate every single event
At a wedding running across several days, treating every event as a matching exercise is exhausting and it shows.
Most couples pick their moments. Coordinate properly for the sangeet or the reception, where you know you will be photographed together all evening, and leave the daytime events alone. Wear what is comfortable and stop thinking about it.
If one of you already has an outfit, bring it in
Bring the actual garment, not a photograph of it. Colour on a phone screen is close to useless — a warm gold and a cool gold look the same in a camera roll and nothing alike in daylight.
With the real thing in front of us we can hold fabric against it and see immediately what works. Building the second look around a piece that already exists tends to produce a better pairing than starting from scratch anyway.
Come in together if you can
This is the part that makes the whole thing easy.
The hard version is one person shopping alone, buying something, then texting the other a photograph with instructions to go and find something that matches. The easy version is both of you here at the same time, trying things on, seeing the two looks side by side in the same light.
Bring the invitation. Tell us which events you are going to. If you have a number in mind for the two outfits, say so and we will keep it in view while we pull options — and then we can get on with the interesting part.
What you are aiming for
The best coordinated couples usually have a connection you would not spot straight away. His vest picking up the embroidery in her lehenga. Gold on both, silver on neither. Two colours that have nothing in common except that they look better together than either does alone.
Two outfits that each suit the person wearing them, and improve when you stand next to each other. That is the thing we are actually trying to build.
Shopping as a couple?
Come in together and we will work on both looks at once. We are at 18507 Pioneer Boulevard in Artesia, in the middle of Little India, with free parking in our own lot behind the store. Walk-ins are welcome and no appointment is needed.
Bring the wedding invitation, and if either of you already has an outfit, bring that too. Wear something easy to change in and out of — you will both be trying on several things, and it makes the visit much quicker. Questions before you come? We are on Instagram at @loveleensari.
Read next
- Going to your first Indian wedding — what actually happens, event by event
- Sari, lehenga, salwar or sharara? — six silhouettes, decoded
- The men's guide — kurta, jacket or a good suit
- Can I wear Indian clothes as a non-Indian guest? — the short answer is yes
- Should you rent or buy? — what a guest outfit really costs